Friday, July 24, 2015

Slightly

I went to a concert last night and the first thing I did when I got home was pull up this brand new post. She {the singer} inspired me to write and I'm running with it because the will and want to write lately hasn't happened very much.

So here it is - the posts I like reading most on other people's blogs ... Honest Ones!

I have been in a rut and not a blogging rut because there was never a clean and/or clear pattern to my writing but more so I've been in a life rut - since March. What I've come to realize is you can hide from your feelings for so long before ultimately they bump crash into you! Now some things I single handily brought on myself like the fact that "if I became involved in 20 million things I wouldn't be able to think, therefor I would be fine" … and raise your hand if that has ever worked out for you *pssshh I know, I know I was just kidding myself.

In the spirit of true blogging transparency I think I was slightly depressed - {don't you like how before depressed I still find the need to say 'think' and 'slightly'} okay I was depressed aka sad, unhappy, downhearted. I let the grief get the best of me. I wasn't depressed in the clinical sense, sit in my room and hate myself I was just super sad and downhearted about our situation and while everyone around me was celebrating life milestones of happiness I was stuck in feeling sad no matter how happy I wanted {and tried} to be for them.


Bible verse, You dont understand now
S O U R C E

My clarity moment in realizing I was slightly depressed came when we spent two weeks caring for a dog that was just not right for our family, in so so many different ways - I thought for sure that is what we needed when in reality I needed to come to terms with what was going on in my head and how I was actually feeling. {ps the dog has already found a lovely home}

I needed to start saying no and drop out of the 20 million things I'd signed up for since March. So I'm slowing it down {well I'm trying} and I'm taking some time for me. I'm praying again and building up my relationship with Him - feeling foolish I let it slide in the first place.
The best part of all of this, is now that I realize I was depressed {and I really think that is the most important - realization} I'm starting to feel unstuck!!



Have you ever thought  you were slightly depressed?? How did you handle it?




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2 comments:

  1. Sometimes I think we can start to slide into a rut without realizing until we're in the thick of it. That's great you've realized and admitted it, because that's the first step to healing. I hope you can continue to say no to things and make time for you, because you deserve that. For me, some soul searching over wine and maybe a book in a bubble bath helps my soul. And I'm here if you need to grab some coffee or wine and girl chat:)

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  2. I miss your posts so much, Laura. I know that it has been tough for you lately and I think of/pray for you often. You are so dear to me and I hate that you are hurting. I think it's wonderful that you're being honest with yourself through all of this and want you to know I am here if you need me. Lots of love friend! XOXO!

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